NEW SHOES!

So I was on the way home from work yesterday (about 7:45 pm) when Charlie calls and says, "So I figured you'd want to know the UPS man just left. I just brought the box inside." And I'm thinking, "Umm, what did I order? I just did an online order for birthday party supplies but I didn't overnight it." And then he says, "I called because it's from Saucony."

I squealed.

These are my new, awesome running shoes I've been drooling over since last fall when I first heard they were updating my favorite running shoe (Saucony Kinvara 2). The Kinvara 3s weren't even released until May 2012. I won one of their weekly contests (thanks to an awesome Facebook family!) and have been waiting anxiously for them to arrive. But they weren't supposed to get here for a couple more weeks.

Anyway, here they are! Now I really, really, REALLY want to go for a run. (PS - I'm changing the laces out on one shoe to the pink ones. I decided to mismatch. I'll post a photo of that another time.)

In other news, I worked 3 shifts in a row again last weekend, and it was ROUGH on my hip. *sigh* I ended up needing pain meds when I got home after the 2nd shift. Not intense, sharp, acute pain like pre-surgery. But very, very tight and sore. I'm really glad the next couple of weeks, I don't do 3 in a row.

Once Charlie is home for the summer starting next week, I look forward to many more days of swimming laps. It's hard to do that when I'm home with Munchkin. But once he's home, I'll definitely be hitting the pool daily. My PT gave me extra ideas to do in the pool, in addition to swimming laps, so I am excited.

Less than 3 weeks til I see my doc. I NEED TO RUN!

Strangers can still hurt my feelings...

I don't know what I'm more upset about today... the rude comment that a random stranger made about me, or the fact that I'm letting it bother me.

So I'm at PT today. The place was full, and I was doing a zig-zag walk across the office with a resistance band around my ankles. There was an older man there doing PT and a woman was with him (wife? sister? I don't know). Anyway, she says to me, "You must be here to lose weight, because you make the exercises look easy." WHAT?? A couple of things here:

1. Could you be any more rude? Okay it's great that you think I make the exercise look easy (it sure isn't, so that's good.) But you think I need to lose weight? This isn't what I want to hear. I've gained almost 15 pounds in the last 5 months (from being immobile, continuing to eat like I was still running, and probably some of that depression-induced overeating too). And I'm not excited about it at all. I had worked so hard and got my body to look exactly how I wanted it, and it all went out the window when I fell. So now random stranger is telling me I need to lose weight. That does wonders for my self-esteem, let me tell ya.
2. Who goes to physical therapy to lose weight anyway? I mean, if I wanted to go anywhere to lose weight, I'd go to a gym and get a trainer. I wouldn't go to physical therapy.

I tried to tell myself that she didn't say what she meant. But it still bugged me. I hate that my weight is a sore point, but it is. And I hate that I let her comment bother me. But it did; it does. And that makes me feel even worse.

Other than that, PT was great. Tried a couple of different exercises. And my PT gave me a couple of other ideas to try in the pool when I go, so that was cool. 

Tomorrow will be a better day, darn it.

The pool is cool.

First things first, I just got back from swimming at the big YMCA pool. I used a board and went 10 full laps (1 lap = out + back; I think that's what swimmers do). Lots and lots of kicking! I stopped at the halfway point on most laps to stretch the hip in different directions and make sure everything felt okay. And it did! It felt great! Oh, I must go to the pool daily. Wish I had time to do that 7 days a week but that would require me to swim at 4 am on the days I work and I am not going to make that sacrifice. So 4 days out of 7 will be fine. Ha!

I worked 3 shifts in a row this weekend, which I was a little concerned about but had the new exercises in my back pocket. I used them throughout and it worked great. I was sore starting at the end of the 2nd shift and hurt that night in bed. My 3rd shift (yesterday) wasn't as bad. (Now, I did float over to the unit with all the little babies so that actually ended up being a good thing for the hip I think.)

Lots on the agenda this week - plan to go to the Y every day in some fashion, plus my PT session on Wednesday.

And my 2 new running skirts arrived on Saturday! YIPPEE! So I already owned 2 skirts (both from runningskirts.com) that I had bought at a significant sale price. I really can't afford their regular prices. But they fit so well and are so fun to run in. So I had a great coupon and found a couple of skirts already on a really good sale. I have more motivation to lose this weight and get ready to run in a few more weeks (come on MD!) Here's the ones I got. So excited!! Sure wish I looked like this in them right now. LOL

Much happier post today

So this is going to be a much more positive post than yesterday's. PT yesterday afternoon was wonderful. And I went to the YMCA today!

1. My PT knew something was wrong as soon as I walked in the door (by reading my face). She reminded me that I should be pretty proud of the fact that I worked 2 shifts in a row and only hurt for the last half of the last day. My body needs to re-learn being on my feet all the time.

2. She gave me some super awesome ideas about exercises to do at work, and also gave me ideas when to do them. For example, there are some standing leg lifts I do (normally with resistance) that I could do at work while I'm pulling meds out of the Accudose machine. I never would have thought of that. Kudos to her. She also taught me a couple of new exercises and stretches that are more at-work-friendly too.

3. After PT, I did feel a lot better physically. I still was hurting, but not like I was prior. I skipped several exercises and we went for a "short day" but the ones I did do, felt really, really good. She reminded me that standing causes a lot of tightness, so I needed to counteract that with the exercises I did yesterday.

4. I woke up feeling better today, just slightly sore, so I did all my home exercises and went ahead to the YMCA. I did 30 minutes on the elliptical at a slow pace and it felt great, no issues whatsoever.

5. Then I got in the pool with Bella. And although I was being a mommy and needing to keep an eye on her, I was able to do a good bit of kicking (a la backstroke and freestyle, but with a noodle and in-place). That felt fantastic. Wish we could have been members of the Y all along, it would have been nice to do this before now (but we were saving money of course).

So all in all, my mood is restored. I'm still a little worried about working 3 shifts in a row this weekend (and every weekend) but maybe with my new ideas and new workouts, it won't be so bad.

So I worked two in a row...

Sat/Sun back-to-back shifts and I'm hurting. *sigh* I did great on Thursday and on Saturday. But about halfway through yesterday's shift, I started having some pain. And it hasn't stopped. It's not awful, but it's definitely there. Took my first pain med this morning in over a month.

Now, the clear head of mine says, "Well duh. 12-hour shifts sometimes made me hurt PRIOR to getting injured. So of course my first consecutive shifts are going to cause some pain. I've been a bum (other than PT) for the last 4.5 months."

But the anxious rest of me says, "What am I supposed to do about it? I've got to work. I'm doing 3-in-a-row so I can keep my WOW contract from here on out. So I'm going to be miserable this weekend since I start my Fri/Sat/Sun rotations in 4 days. Am I going to hurt forever? Am I going to be able to work like this?"

Ugh. I wanted to go to the YMCA today to do ellipticals and swim, before PT this afternoon. Clearly that isn't happening. I'm a little worried about PT alone. But it'll also give me the opportunity to ask about some exercises or stretches that I may be able to do at work if I start to have pain.

I'm sure part of this is the fact that I was SO excited that Thursday and Saturday went so, so well. So I figured I was good to go. So some of this is disappointment and frustration. I'm sure I'll feel fine tomorrow and my mood will snap back too.

Awesome day!

So yesterday (May 10) was my first day back at work, which meant 12-hour shifts on my feet (why my MD took so long to approve me to go back to work). And it was a total success. Around 9 hours in, I started feeling a little sore and tired but that was it. No pain.

Whew.

I figured I'd be fine, but that isn't to say I wasn't nervous beforehand (albeit that was mostly mental, afraid I'd forget how to do my job type stuff). But I am fortunate to work with an AMAZING team of nurses and techs who took excellent care of me. I had an easy assignment, and folks kept checking to see if I was feeling okay. I was a little more purposeful in sitting down than I used to be pre-injury, so that was good. I'm off today and then work Sat/Sun this weekend.

Can I say, I love my job?

On a separate note, a few weeks back, I had entered a contest run by Saucony, the makers of my beautiful, favorite fabulous running shoes called Kinvara 2s (see this post: I love talking about running.) The contest was a week-long and you had to send in pictures of what inspired you to run. Well, for me, that's easy. Rachael. She's why I started running (the NYC Half was for charity in her memory). So I entered one of my favorite pictures of her and had so many of my awesome Facebook friends and family vote for me. Well I found out yesterday that I officially WON!

I get a new pair of Saucony Kinvara 3s!!! Again, see this post: I love talking about running where I was drooling over these. I've been waiting with great anticipation for these for over for six months when I first heard the changes they were making to the Kinvara 2s. These just went on sale a couple of weeks ago. Yippee!!!

Apparently they will ship in 4-6 weeks. Lovely timing, I might add, considering my orthopedic surgeon told me on Wednesday that when I see him in 6 weeks, he will probably clear me to run (though I have to start on the treadmill).

Well, I got 1/2 of what I wanted.

1. MD released me to go to work. YAY! So I'm going TOMORROW!

2. MD did not release me to run. BOO.

So I admit, I understand where he's coming from. He went through my range of motion stuff and said I'm still really tight in a couple of directions. He said he is so incredibly more-than-pleased with my progress, but I still need to be further along before I attempt running again. He says we're still only 2.5 months from surgery and I need to be a little stronger because it was such a weird, out of this world injury.

When I do return to running, he asked that I avoid downtown Charleston and stick to flat, paved courses or tracks. That, I totally understand.

He still wants me going to PT but now just once a week instead of twice. So that's improvement. And I have no physical restrictions at all, other than running.

He suggested I spend lots of time on bikes, ellipticals, and swimming. I have no access to any of the above but will probably re-join the Summerville YMCA this week so that I have that access for the next couple of months. I need to do as much as I can because my cardiovascular fitness is still awful and although I have been doing lots of core and strength training, I have lost all aerobic ability. And I need to lose all the weight I've gained in the last 4.5 months.

So some good news, and some bad. I know it's for the best. But I want to run badly.

Finally, he said I will definitely be a case study that he wants to present in the future. I told him by all means. :)

Tomorrow, ACK!

Feeling a bit nervous about tomorrow's appointment with my orthopedic surgeon. It's weird. After 4.5 months, I expect him to release me to return to work and also to attempt running again. And although I'm really excited about both, I'm also getting really anxious.

What if I go to work on Thursday and it's way harder than I thought? What if after 4 hours, all I want to do is lie down? What if I'm just exhausted? What if my hip actually really hurts, when I haven't had pain in weeks? What if *gasp* I forget stuff I need to know for my job? I mean, darn, I haven't taken care of a patient since New Year's Eve. I am going to be way rusty. I miss my kids and my co-workers immensely and I need to feel like I'm contributing to the world again. I'd also like to earn a paycheck. I'm just way more nervous about this than I expected.

And then for running... What if I start running, follow all the suggestions from both MD and PT, and it is really really hard? Harder than it should be? I know I won't be fast. But what if every run is just painful and horribly slow and completely un-enjoyable? That would make me incredibly sad. I want running to give me all the same emotional highs and feelings of freedom and satisfaction and pride that it used to. But if it doesn't? Ugh.

I'm sure I'm just overanalyzing in typical Lori fashion. I guess I just really want to fast forward a couple of weeks and get past the growing pains of this.

PT, check!

So I may have seen my physical therapist for the last time today. *gasp* Well, to clarify, I still go on Monday but she won't be there. She doesn't expect my MD to continue my therapy (except my home exercises of course). So weird.

I did the treadmill again today, walking of course, and I set the speed at 4 for 10 minutes. That's about as fast as I can walk on that thing without breaking into a jog (which I wanted to do). Only went 0.66 miles.

Then she had me "jog" on a little mini-trampoline for 2 minutes. Halfway through she asked how I felt. My response? "I feel like slinging open the front door and coming back in about an hour after a nice jog through the city." Ha! She said there's no reason the MD shouldn't clear me to run next week. Woo hoo!

Now I need to buy an exercise ball so I can do my Supermans, crunches, and squats.

Last night we went to a member's preview at the Aquarium to check out the new Madagascar exhibit (read: lemurs, hissing cockroaches, parrots, Nile crocodile, and bunches of frogs and geckos and the like). Last time I went to the Aquarium I required use of a wheelchair to get around (the crutches would have worn me out). So this was going to be great, sans crutches. I got around pretty well, except for the stairs. I can go down stairs fine. But going up the stairs, I still feel the annoying patellar tendonitis in the right knee when I lead with the right leg. That pulling up motion doesn't feel so good. I want to feel 100% normal and I'm about 90% (I'm not including running in this; just talking about pain and range of motion). But then again, it's only been 2 months since surgery. I just wish the knee thing would go away. I didn't hurt my knee, I hurt my hip, so I would like my knee to cooperate, please. The good thing is, walking makes it feel very happy. Running had better do the same. *wink*